Sarai and Hagar
Text: Genesis 16
Core Idea: Our God is a God who sees and hears. You’re not forgotten – He will find you even in your wilderness. So, let’s not try to take matters into our own hands when our plans don’t work out. Let’s trust the One who is in control over all things. He doesn’t need our help. He’ll accomplish His will in His perfect timing.
INTRODUCTION
Well, we’ve been walking through the Book of Genesis – tracing how God’s plan of salvation began. And two weeks ago, we looked at Chapter 15, where we saw God’s unwavering commitment to Abram. When Abram was weighed down with fear that the kings from the east might retaliate, God called him by name and comforted him by saying, “Don’t be afraid, Abram, for I am your shield and your very great reward.” And when Abram wrestled with doubt – doubt about God (“How do I know if You’ll really do what You said You’ll do?”) and doubt about himself (“What if I fail and disqualify myself?”) – to bring assurance to his anxious heart, God entered into a covenant with Abram. In the ancient world, people made covenants, not by signing a paper but by acting out symbolic rituals to show the seriousness of the agreement. So, for example, by walking through the path of slaughtered animals, the people making that covenant were saying, “If I break my vows, may I be as these animals. May I be cut to pieces.” Now, normally, in a covenant between a king and a servant, only the servant walked through as a way to pledge his loyalty to the king. But to Abram’s amazement, God passed through it. And if that wasn’t shocking enough, He did it alone – Abram never walked the path. And in doing so, God was basically saying, “If I’m not faithful to the covenant, I will pay the penalty. But if you’re not faithful to the covenant, I will still pay the penalty on your behalf. Whether you fail or I fail, I will take the blame – and I will make things right again, for My blessing to you is unconditional. I will bless you no matter what, for that is what I promised.” Can you imagine what Abram must have felt at that moment? It must have washed away all his doubts and strengthened his faith. So, at this point, you would assume that a mind-blowing experience like this would cause Abram to never waver again – but what we’ll see today is that Abram stumbles once more. And yet what’s amazing is that even when he was faithless, God remained faithful.
Now, one thing you’ll notice in today’s passage is that the focus shifts to Sarai. Up to this point, she has been present but silent – we have no idea what she was thinking. As far as we know, God has never spoken to her directly – which means that she has only heard about God’s promises through Abram. So, if Abram, even after all his extraordinary encounters with God, struggled with doubt, we can imagine how much more Sarai must have wrestled with it, asking herself, “How could I possibly bear a child at my age?” And yet there must have also been a growing hope, wondering, “Could it really be that I’ll become a mother after all?” Then, with that tension in mind, please turn your Bibles to Genesis 16 – and I’ll read this for us.
1 Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; 2 so she said to Abram, “The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.” Abram agreed to what Sarai said. 3 So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife. 4 He slept with Hagar, and she conceived. When she knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress. 5 Then Sarai said to Abram, “You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering. I put my slave in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me. May the LORD judge between you and me.” 6 “Your slave is in your hands,” Abram said. “Do with her whatever you think best.” Then Sarai mistreated Hagar; so she fled from her. 7 The angel of the LORD found Hagar near a spring in the desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur. 8 And he said, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?” “I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” she answered. 9 Then the angel of the LORD told her, “Go back to your mistress and submit to her.” 10 The angel added, “I will increase your descendants so much that they will be too numerous to count.” 11 The angel of the LORD also said to her: “You are now pregnant and you will give birth to a son. You shall name him Ishmael, for the LORD has heard of your misery. 12 He will be a wild donkey of a man; his hand will be against everyone and everyone’s hand against him, and he will live in hostility toward all his brothers.” 13 She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.” 14 That is why the well was called Beer Lahai Roi; it is still there, between Kadesh and Bered. 15 So Hagar bore Abram a son, and Abram gave the name Ishmael to the son she had borne. 16 Abram was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore him Ishmael.
Amen. This is the Word of God for you today.
Let me share three things from this passage:
· SARAI’S SCHEME
· GOD’S COMPASSION
· HAGAR’S HOPE
1) SARAI’S SCHEME
Immediately after the dramatic covenant scene in Chapter 15, our passage opens with a sobering reminder – verse 1, “Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children.” In other words, despite God’s promises, Sarai’s painful reality had not changed, in that she was still barren. Let’s pause and trace the timeline for a second. Genesis 12:4 tells us that Abram was 75 when he left Harran, and Genesis 16:16 says he was 86 when Ishmael was born – which means that ten years had passed since God first promised him a son. And because Genesis 17:17 shows us that Sarai was ten years younger than Abram, she would’ve been about 75 in our text today. Now, let’s think about Sarai’s situation. In her culture, a woman’s value was tied to her ability to bear children. So, to be barren was to live under shame, disappointment, and despair all the time. Considering that Sarai had been married for some time, we could speculate that she must have carried this stigma for decades – likely 30 or 40 years of longing and discouragement. Now, when Abram received a promise from this God named Yahweh in Genesis 12, she followed Abram into an unknown land and endured trials like being taken into Pharaoh’s house and seeing Lot carried off into captivity – and yet she continued to cling to the hope of God’s promise that Abram must have so passionately shared with her. But after ten long years with no sign of a child, it must have started to take a toll on her soul. Listen to what she said in verse 2, “The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.” Like Abram in Chapter 15, who assumed Eliezer might be his heir, Sarai now assumed that maybe God intended to fulfill His promise in another way – through her servant, Hagar. In other words, this was her trying to make sense of this delay – “If God promised a son, why am I still barren? Is there something I’m missing? Maybe this is how it’s supposed to happen – not through me but my servant.” When things did not happen according to her plans, instead of trusting God’s timing, Sarai took matters into her own hands. Now, to us, this sounds shocking – and we can be quick to judge her for that. But in the ancient world, this was normal. In fact, it was a common practice for a barren wife to give her servant to her husband – and the child born would legally be considered hers. So, Sarai wasn’t doing something scandalous – she was just following her culture’s solution to infertility. But here’s the problem: just because something is culturally acceptable doesn’t make it right before God. What seemed reasonable to Sarai was, in God’s eyes, disobedience and unbelief. And the result, as we’ll see, was jealousy, conflict, and heartache – the inevitable outcome whenever we lean on cultural wisdom instead of trusting God’s word.
Of course, all of this could’ve been avoided if Abram had led in a way that honored God. When Sarai suggested her plan, he should’ve said no. He should’ve reminded her of God’s covenant. He should’ve said, “Sarai, I know you’re anxious, but let’s wait for the Lord, for He promised He would do this. I saw with my own eyes God passing through that path of slaughtered animals. He will never let us down. Then, let’s not trust our circumstances – let’s trust the One who is faithful. He doesn’t need our help.” But that’s not what we read – verse 2, “Abram agreed to what Sarai said.” It literally says, “Abram listened to the voice of Sarai.” Think about the contrast. In Chapter 15, Abram listened to God’s voice. But here, he listened to human reasoning shaped by cultural norms. Then, let me ask you, “Whose voice is shaping your decisions today? Do you lean on the loudest cultural solutions, or on the quiet Word of God? Husbands, are you leading your families by faith, or allowing fear, impatience, or pressure to make you passive?” The truth is that it’s easy to believe God in theory but act on human wisdom in practice. Have you ever done that? You say you trust God and that you’ll wait for Him – but then you do what the culture says you should do, or you give in to the pressure from others. But friends, true faith means letting God’s voice have the final say in our lives, not other voices.
Verse 4 shows us the consequence of this decision – “He slept with Hagar, and she conceived. When she knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress.” In Hebrew, it literally says, “Her mistress was small in her eyes.” In other words, Hagar began to look down on Sarai. Hagar now felt superior because she was able to do what Sarai couldn’t – giving Abram the son he so desperately longed for. Listen to what Sarai says in verse 5, “You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering. I put my slave in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me. May the LORD judge between you and me.” Now, some have criticized Sarai by saying, “Don’t blame Abram. Wasn’t this your idea? You brought this on yourself! Don’t try to put this on your husband!” But before you think that way, remember that Sarai lived in a world where a woman’s worth was measured by her ability to bear children. Then, here’s the heart of what she was saying, “Abram, you know I did everything I could for us to have a child. I even swallowed my pride and gave you my slave as your wife. But now she treats me like I’m beneath her just because she’s pregnant. You should’ve made it clear who’s in charge. You should’ve defended me. You should’ve told her this child belongs to us, not her. But you stayed silent. I did my part. Why didn’t you do yours? It’s all your fault that we’re in this mess.” Does it make sense why Sarai was so upset? She blamed Abram for failing to set boundaries and protect her dignity. Again, Abram could’ve intervened here. He could’ve helped them reconcile. He could’ve led Sarai to repent together for trying to take matters into their own hands. He could’ve done so many things – but he didn’t. He simply said, “She’s your slave. Do whatever you want with her.” So, that’s exactly what Sarai did – she mistreated Hagar, and Hagar fled. Honestly, this left me wondering, “Where’s the Abram who left everything to follow God? Where’s the Abram who fought kings to rescue Lot? Where’s the Abram who believed God’s promises?” Here, we see him faltering again. And yet, doesn’t that mirror our own lives? One day, we’re bold and faithful – but the next day, we’re fearful and compromised. All that to say, Abram’s failures remind us that he was no different from us – he was a sinner in need of God’s grace and mercy, just like us.
Now, let’s reflect on Sarai and Hagar a bit more. Think with me: “Why was Hagar so puffed up? And why was Sarai so crushed? Why did Hagar feel superior? And why did Sarai feel inferior?” Because for both of them, bearing children had become the source of their worth. Was Hagar happy to have a child? I’m sure she was. But more fundamentally speaking, being pregnant with that child was important because it made her feel like somebody. In other words, this was not about the child but her – her significance and her status in the family. For Sarai, the opposite was true – her barrenness left her feeling like a nobody. It wasn’t that she renounced God, but having a child had become her functional idol – the thing she lived for, the thing she thought would give her meaning and purpose. No wonder she burned with anger toward Hagar, who now had what she did not have. Here’s what this means: Sarai’s attempt to take control only revealed the idol of her heart. Then, let me ask you, “What does our culture tell us we must have in order to obtain significance and worth for ourselves? For women in Sarai’s days, it was bearing children. What about us? What does this world pressure us to run after so that we can feel like somebody? Career success? Marriage? Financial stability? Owning a house? Be able to travel anywhere you want? Being recognized? Being admired? Being right all the time? Having a good reputation? Being physically attractive? What makes you feel like somebody? What is it that you’re after today? Where are you trying to gain your worth from? And how does that pursuit make you feel superior to some people and inferior to others?” Brothers and sisters, our culture will keep shouting at us about what makes us valuable, and our hearts will keep being tempted to grab hold of those idols. But every idol that promises worth will only enslave us. True freedom and lasting worth can only come from God. He’s the only One who can give us value that no circumstance can take away. So, stop trying to take control – instead, throw yourself into the arms of the One who truly is in control over all things.
2) GOD’S COMPASSION
We don’t know exactly how Sarai mistreated Hagar. It may have been verbal – belittling her as a slave. Or it may have been physical – overworking her or stripping away the dignity of being Abram’s wife. Whatever it was, it was so severe that Hagar fled. Verse 7 tells us that she was on the road to Shur – a region in Egypt. Considering that she was an Egyptian slave, she was essentially trying to go back home – back to the people she knew. But this was no easy journey. Scholars estimate the trip to be 250-300 km, which would’ve taken her around 7-10 days. For a pregnant woman traveling alone, I can’t even imagine how painful this journey would’ve been. And yet she chose that dangerous road – which tells us just how desperate and intolerable her situation had become. Then comes an unbelievable moment – verse 7, “The angel of the LORD found Hagar near a spring in the desert.” Victor Hamilton writes, “The angel of the LORD is more a representation of God than a representative of God.” And Richard Phillips writes, “There is little doubt that this divine messenger was God Himself in bodily form.” I share from these two commentaries (by the way, there’s a lot more that say the same thing) because it means that Hagar wasn’t just meeting a messenger of God – she was having a divine encounter with the LORD Himself as she traveled through the wilderness. Now, I don’t know if you caught it – but there’s an important word that reveals the compassionate heart of God. Let me read that verse again: “The angel of the LORD found Hagar” – implying that God went looking for her. Abram didn’t go after her. Sarai didn’t care for her. But God did. Hagar may have thought she was invisible, despised, and unwanted – but she was not forgotten. God knew her, came to her, and called her by name – verse 8, “Hagar, slave of Sarai.” Now, did you know that Hagar is the only woman in the OT whom God personally addresses by name? Abram never calls her Hagar. Sarai never calls her Hagar. To them, she was only a slave. But to God, she was Hagar. She was seen. She was known. She was valued. And God’s heart went out to her. Listen to what He says in verse 11, “You are now pregnant and you will give birth to a son. You shall name him Ishmael, for the LORD has heard of your misery.” Initially, I thought that was odd because it doesn’t say, “The Lord has heard your prayers or cries.” It says, “The Lord has heard your misery.” This is so important because it means that God went to find Hagar, not because she prayed the perfect prayer, not because she was so desperately crying out for God, but simply because He saw that she was crushed by her misery. And He moved toward her with mercy.
And this is where Hagar’s story becomes our story. Friends, do you feel invisible today – overlooked at work, unappreciated in your family, and unnoticed in your struggles? Do you feel worthless because you don’t measure up to cultural standards of success – no great career, no perfect family, or no impressive reputation? Are you hurt and mistreated like Hagar – and are you wondering if anyone really cares? Well, our text today tells us God does. It reminds us that you’re not forgotten. He sees you, knows you, and hears your misery. If He went into the wilderness to find Hagar, He will find you in your wilderness as well. In fact, this is exactly why Christ came – Luke 15:4, “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it?” Luke 19:10, “The Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.” Jesus is the Shepherd who searches, the Savior who hears our cries, the Redeemer who calls us by name and gives us worth – not because of our performance or circumstances, but because of His unchanging love for us. So, let me ask you, “Where are you running? What wilderness are you in?” Let this passage remind you that you cannot outrun the God who sees. Just as He met Hagar at the spring, God will find you and meet you in your place of need. And if that’s His heart toward us, it must shape our hearts toward others as well. Who are the Hagars around you – the overlooked, the marginalized, the ones the world treats as nobodies? As God’s people, we’re called to see them, name them, and move toward them with dignity and compassion. Imagine what kind of community we could be if every hurting person who walked through our doors could say, “This is the place where I am seen, where my cries are heard, and where God has found me.” May that be true of us.
3) HAGAR’S HOPE
God says in verse 8, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?” And Hagar responded, “I’m running away from my mistress Sarai.” Now, considering the mistreatment she endured, we might expect God to affirm her escape, saying something like this: “Hagar, you’ve suffered enough. So, keep going – go back to your home in Egypt. I’ll protect you there and give you a new beginning. No one will harm you there.” But that’s not what He says – verse 9, “Go back to your mistress and submit to her.” At first glance, this sounds incredibly harsh. Why would the God of compassion send her back to the very place of pain she was running from – a place of abuse? The truth is that this text doesn’t tell us why. God doesn’t explain why He was giving this command. But one thing He does is that He doesn’t just tell her to go back – He sends her back with a promise. Verse 10, “I will increase your descendants so much that they will be too numerous to count.” And verse 11, “You will give birth to a son.” In other words, God was not dismissing her suffering – He was affirming her with His presence, securing her future, and reminding her that He heard her misery. It’s as if He was saying, “Go back, but go back with Me. Go back, not as an abandoned slave, but as someone who’s seen, known, and cherished by Me. I know it’s hard to understand this right now, but My plans for you are always good. So, trust Me and obey, for I will bless you.” Now, Hagar could’ve just ignored God and continued her journey back to Egypt – but she didn’t. Why? What made her go back? Verse 13, “She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me.’” Interestingly, that last phrase in Hebrew is actually a question – it literally says, “Have I really seen the One who sees me?” It’s like she was asking, “Did God really meet with me – a slave girl? How is this possible? But more importantly, how am I still alive after seeing God’s face?” She was overwhelmed by the fact that God, who sees everything, sees her too – that she got to see the One who rules all things. And that was all she needed to go back to Sarai. Her astonishment of God became her courage. She was basically saying, “If God, as great as that, lets me in, if God, like that, loves me like this, what do I have to be afraid of? If He is with me, who can be against me?”
The truth is that sometimes God doesn’t always rescue us from hard places we may find ourselves in. Sometimes, instead of removing us from the wilderness, He calls us back into the very situations we’d rather escape. But He’ll never send us back empty-handed – He’ll always send us with His promises. Why? Because what we need most is not a change of circumstance, but the assurance that He is with us, that He sees us, and that He is working for our good even in places of pain. Like Hagar, we can endure difficult seasons when we know the God who sees, hears, and finds us. And if we ever doubt that, we only need to look at the cross. Humanly speaking, the cross was the worst possible outcome – betrayal, injustice, suffering, and death. So, from our perspective, the “right” thing would’ve been for God to spare His Son – to rescue Him from such agony. In fact, Jesus could’ve abandoned His mission and walked away – but He didn’t. He chose the cross, knowing the Father would use even that horrific event for the greatest good. And that’s exactly what happened – through the darkest moment in history, God made a way for sinners like you and me to be welcomed into His presence forever. So, brothers and sisters, take heart. The wilderness you’re in, the hardship you face, the place you dread returning to – none of it is wasted. If God could send Hagar back for her good, and if He could turn the cross into the means of salvation, then He can redeem even the hardest chapters of your life. Now, I don’t say this lightly, knowing I will never fully understand the pain you may be going through right now. In fact, some of you may be dreading going back home, to work, or to school because what awaits you may be unbearably painful. But remember this: you’re not going back empty-handed. You’re going back with the promise that the God who sees all things sees you, knows you, and goes with you. You may not see it now, but He is working for your ultimate good. So, friends, go back with hope. Because of Christ, even the hardest road can become the very path where God meets you with life.
CONCLUSION
Lighthouse family, our God is a God who sees and hears. You’re not forgotten – He will find you even in your wilderness. So, let’s not try to take matters into our own hands when our plans don’t work out. Let’s trust the One who is in control over all things. He doesn’t need our help. He’ll accomplish His will in His perfect timing.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1) Where do you feel most tempted to measure your worth by cultural standards rather than by God’s promises?
2) In what ways do we, like Sarai, try to “help” God fulfill His promises on our own terms?
3) What does it mean that God hears our misery even when we don’t know how to pray? How have you experienced God’s compassion in times when you felt invisible, forgotten, or overlooked?
4) Why do you think God sent Hagar back to Sarai instead of allowing her to escape? What might this teach us about how God works in hard situations? What difference does it make to know that God doesn’t always change our circumstances but promises to be with us in them?